The news of the death of Kaye Young Cowher on Saturday was shocking. Losing loved ones is most always painful and sad. I remember when Kaye and Faye Young played basketball at North Carolina State. I, like many others, was not aware that she had melanoma. My mind went immediately to three young daughters who have now lost their mother before they are married - the youngest of the three having just finished one year of college. The loss of parents is always difficult. I have memories of feeling much like an orphan.
But...Bill Cowher and Kaye Young had been a pair for a long time and married long enough to have grown together as with any good marriage. His words (about her and what she meant to he and his daughters) were very touching. They have experienced much as a couple always at one anothers' side. Obviously, they were best friends.
Today as I saw the video of him at the church for her services I felt that same pain that I experienced some years back when my Ken lost his battle for life. Until one has endured that particular kind of pain you can't appreciate the physical pain one actually endures when you lose your partner. An actual physical pain for an emotional feeling! It hurts beyond the power of words to express. Your chest actually aches and there is an emptiness that nothing can fill. (Not even the winning of a SuperBowl as the Steelers' coach.) Having experienced that which I attempt to describe my heart went out to him this day as he laid her to rest. He will survive the grief that lies ahead but will emerge a different person from the experience.
It will be interesting to see what this pain motivates him to do.
C. S. Lewis said, " Pain is God's megaphone to arouse a deaf world."
Anne Morrow Lindbergh wrote," I do not believe that sheer suffering teaches. To suffering must be added mourning, understanding, patience, love, openness and the willingness to remain vulnerable."
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